Beautiful Memories

Kellisa having an "Austin Powers" moment at the Soo Locks.
Sault Ste. Marie, Ontario Canada

Kellisa out grew or stopped using these chairs years ago and they've been taking up space we don't have to spare. I should have donated the chairs years ago, but I've struggled to find a place that would take them. We even moved a couple of these chairs across the country when we relocated to California from Florida in early 2016.

I even tried to give them away online, just asking for shipping in return for a free chair without any success. The chairs are well used and need a little love, but I figured they could be a real blessing for several families not in a position to get new chairs.

It was time and I was determined to give them away, somewhere, and I didn't care what I needed to do or how far I needed to drive. I wanted them gone and in families who needed them. We would never use them again!

I found a place about 100 miles south of us and the lady seemed genuinely excited when I explained what I had to donate and why. Egypt decided to go along for the ride. As the miles passed and Egypt was lost playing games and listening to her music, I found myself feeling melancholy. I knew I was doing the right thing, but couldn't help going through the memories in my mind of Kellisa in her chairs.

These chairs represent comfort, freedom, and independence for Kellisa. Her everyday school chair with bus tie-downs represents 5 amazing years of school in Florida. 

The blue jog stroller covered many miles of trails. 

The tan jogger was the "vehicle" I used to push Kellisa down to the shore of Crater Lake back in 2009 while risking arrest. It is also the chair we overloaded at the Grand Canyon back in June 2010.

But, it was Kellisa's yellow travel chair that created the most sorrow while reflecting. This chair became part of Kellisa as she made great steps in becoming the young lady she is today. We purchased this chair to save her expensive, every day wheelchair while traveling. This chair traveled on hundreds of flights and was used for Jaguars games when we had season tickets. We even traveled to an away game in Detroit. This chair was an extension of adventurous Kellisa and never let her down. I can only hope this chair and the others create similar memories for new families.

We arrived at the Society for disABILITIES in Modesto and were greeted by the lady from the phone. She helped us bring the chairs inside where we met the man who would clean up the chairs and make sure they were safe and ready for their next occupants. This made me feel good knowing they'd be updated by an expert. Their sincere appreciation replaced my melancholy with gratitude. I was thankful to be helping others.

4 Chairs

Countless Adventures

Thousands of Miles

So Many Beautiful Memories...

Many airline tags remain from trips long ago.

Goodbye

Thank you!

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"The End"

 April 7, 2021

Oakmont High School

Roseville, CA

Kellisa's first day of school.
Mandarin Oaks Elementary - Jacksonville, FL
August 7, 2002

Today is a sad day. 

Lisa and I will be attending Kellisa's last IEP meeting by Zoom. We've been doing these for 19 years and it's hard to believe our work with the local school district is coming to an end with Kellisa.

Kellisa loved going to school, from riding the bus to her classroom to wheeling around Oakmont High School delivering the mail. She loved everyone she came in contact with and they loved her back. Kellisa couldn't wheel anywhere without students and staff yelling, "KK" which was always greeted with smiles and kisses. School was Kellisa's world.

Like millions of other kids, her world changed when she was lowered from her bus on Friday, March 13, 2020. We knew her school was shutting down, but we were hopeful it would only last 3-4 weeks. Little did we know at the time that Kellisa would never return to the place she ruled. Besides missing out on daily activities and missing her friends, Kellisa missed her last dances, prom, and graduation.

She's been going to school since she was 3-years-old and earned the right to have an amazing last year. I know it's more important that we've kept her safe during a global pandemic, but Kellisa has always missed out on so much and as her parents, we've missed out on most of the milestones and joys of being a parent. We have to wonder, "WHY?"

We will be discussing Kellisa's options in the community once she ages out of public school next month on her 22nd birthday. We should have been attending and observing the different programs and jobs available to her to help us make our decisions, but that hasn't been possible. We know there were some amazing programs pre-COVID, but have no idea what they look like now, if anything is even operating.

Kellisa has been doing better than expected locked up at home for more then a year, but we can tell she's going a little stir crazy after spending her first 21 years going at breakneck speeds. We do have some hopes and plans for Kellisa once it's safe for her to venture out, but for now, we endure.

We've been holding out hope for a miracle so Kellisa could return to school at some point. Even though we've known for awhile it wasn't to be, reality is hitting hard as we prepare for one last sit down with Kellisa's school to discuss, "The End". 

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A New Christmas Tradition?

We don't have many traditions in our family, but most of the few we do have happen at Christmas time. We often travel on other holidays and are rarely home for Easter and Thanksgiving, but we are always at home for Christmas. Lisa makes a traditional meal, the girls wear new dresses, and we visit the tree on display in the downtown area wherever we live. As far as trees, Lisa and I didn't put one up before kids. We lost Everett on December 7th and Christmas was a rough time for us. When Kellisa was born, my dad wanted to make sure she had a tree at home and bought us a small fiber optic tree which we used every year until it died. We did replace it to keep the tradition going...guess we have another one.

When Kellisa was 4 years old, we purchased an artificial tree that we used every year, but we threw it out when we moved to California. Instead of buying another artificial tree and storing it all year in our limited space, we decided to purchase real trees. For some reason, we always wait until the weekend before Christmas to pick a tree from a mostly empty lot near our house. We are always shocked at the high prices and Lisa is usually able to negotiate $20 - $40 off a $200 tree since it's so close to Christmas.

Egypt was asking to get a tree earlier this year and I somehow read an article about the national forests in Northern California offering permits for only $10 to cut your own tree. I did a little research and found the closest to our house, Tahoe National Forest was included. The idea is to thin the forest to help lower wildfire dangers while also allowing more mature trees thrive. I got a permit and a map of areas where harvesting live Christmas trees was allowed. I picked an area I was familiar with about an hour from our driveway.

I was hoping it would be a family outing, but Lisa stayed home with Kellisa as she was still recovering from her surgery. After purchasing a small chainsaw, Egypt and I headed out to the forest. As we gained elevation, the temperature dropped and patches of snow decorated the forest floor. We enjoyed some spectacular views before Egypt saw the perfect tree a short distance off the dirt road we were driving down. 

We got out and walked over to the tree and Egypt had already made up her mind. I could see at least 6 other trees that were just as perfect. Our permit limited us to trees less than 20ft. tall and trunk diameters of no more than 6 inches. I asked Egypt to at least look and consider the other trees. To her credit, she humored me and checked each tree out. Egypt was adamant about her first choice still being the best. I couldn't help but agree.

I went back and got the chainsaw as Egypt walked Evie. We posed for a few pictures before Egypt helped me cut down our first ever Christmas tree from the wild. I dragged it back and tied it down before driving back home. 

I had visions of clipping the tree once it was home to make it the perfect Christmas tree shape, but we decided to leave it natural even though it was a little uneven and stuck out in our main walkway from the front door to the kitchen, living room, and Kellisa's bedroom. 

Our tree was perfect and we started talking about "next year" and doing it again before we even decorated this tree. 

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