Open Pond Trail

 

Kellisa- The Dancer

 Kellisa became a dancer 14 years ago this month. To be honest, we knew Kellisa loved music and swinging her arms and shaking her head around, but we never thought Kellisa would take dance lessons. That all changed when she came home from school early in her 3rd Grade Year with a dance flyer given to her by long time friend, Lindsay. Switzerland Dance School, a local business, was starting a special needs class. We didn't hesitate, Kellisa was signed up the same day and she spent years dancing with her peers and able body girls of all ages. The pinnacle of her dance career would be the annual dance recitals held at the Lazzara Performance Hall on the campus of the University of North Florida. 

Sadly, Kellisa's friend Lindsay who opened the door to Kellisa's dance career gained her angel wings far too early. We will never forget Lindsay and the friendship she shared with Kellisa. 

First day of dance (August 2007) 

2011 Dance Recital

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Rugged Access for All

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High School

So many years...memories...friendships...

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Airports Visited - 2020 Update

All-time list of airports visited:

Chris- 122
Kellisa- 60
Lisa- 45
Laurel- 41
Evie- 5

2020 - Chris added Great Falls, MT. Before COVID shut down the world, Egypt flew from Las Vegas to Sacramento (One-Way) and both girls and Lisa flew R/T from Sacramento to Portland, OR, but didn't add any new airports.

2019 was another year where all of our family trips were to Chicago to visit family. Lisa and Evie didn't visit any new airports. Laurel had one father/daughter trip where she added Hollywood/Burbank and Salt Lake City airports to her list. 

Kellisa and Chris added Billings and Kahului while working on their book. Kellisa also added Boise, Oklahoma City, and Salt Lake City while Chris added Redmond/Bend, San Francisco, Vancouver, Victoria, and Saskatoon while working his regular job.

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22

 GO BIG or Stay Home!

After years of going big for Kellisa's birthday, we stayed home for the second year in a row due to the global pandemic. We had HUGE plans last year for Kellisa's 21st birthday, but didn't even think about doing much this year. We're still playing it safe since Kellisa is considered high risk. 

Kellisa woke up a 22-year-old young lady and enjoyed a low key day at home with family. She enjoyed a push through the neighborhood before opening presents from family and friends. Kellisa watched and listened to plenty of The Wiggles and Hannah Montana. She selected a Poke bowl with brown rice, raw salmon, avocado, and house sauce for dinner. We ended the festivities with a best of both world cake, half vanilla and half chocolate. All in all another great birthday.

We are so ready and hopeful.....2022 will be a very big year as we make up for lost time! 

Enjoy a few pictures from today:

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Kellisa Loves it Loud...Now

   Kellisa turns 22 on May 23rd and due to the ongoing pandemic, we do not have anything big planned for the second year in a row. I came up with the idea to share a few Kellisa stories in the week leading up to her big day. I'd like to post one a day, but only have two planned so far. These might be stories shared for the first time or stories that can be found elsewhere, but I'll add new details and/or more background. 

It's easy to find Kellisa if there's loud music blasting from speakers because she will always wheel as close as she can and park herself for maximum exposure. This is true of every dance she attends and PE class at school when they play music in the gym. And she's not shy, if its not loud enough, she will ask for more volume. 

Kellisa spent 113 days in the NICU with alarms and bells going off around the clock, so you might assume she was accustomed to loud noises from her early days. You'd be wrong. Kellisa was petrified of noise, any noise, not just loud noise. Sudden noise was the worst. Kellisa would cry uncontrollably for hours when startled. She was inconsolable and would approach hyperventilating. It was horrible.

Lisa and I lived on eggshells. We couldn't even turn on the water at the kitchen sink if Kellisa was within hearing range and her hearing was heightened. One of us would have to take Kellisa to the farthest bedroom, close the door, and hug her with one of her ears pressed against our chest while using a free hand to cover her other ear. This would give the other person a few minutes to make minimal noise in the kitchen. Don't even think about opening a can of pop. 

It was always bad when we accidently made a sound or just let our guard down for a second because it would be at least 45 minutes of Kellisa screaming and shaking. While we could mostly control what happened inside our house, controlling what went on outside was a different challenge. Normal noises would send Kellisa crashing, a dog's bark, a motorcycle, kids laughing, literally any sound. Living life on eggshells was not pleasant. 

Slowly, extremely slowly Kellisa would get a little better at handling noise. She was always OK with riding in a car and even at her many doctor and therapist visits. We figured it was familiar sounds and she just struggled with unknown and sudden sounds. It didn't matter how loud or soft, any sound was scary.

Eventually, we tried to take Kellisa to a restaurant right before her first birthday. We chose The Lighthouse Café in New Smyrna Beach, FL for this experiment in sound. We made it to the front door and as soon as I opened it and we were hit with noise, Kellisa started her meltdown. We left defeated, but wouldn't give up. A few months later, we returned to The Lighthouse Café. We made it to the Hostess Counter before having to leave.  

This was repeated every couple of months and eventually we were seated, but left before ordering. Then, we ordered, but would have to leave before the food arrived. You guessed it, we ordered, the food arrived, and then a plate broke on the floor and we left without eating. We probably went to the restaurant 12-15 times and never ate a meal inside. We relocated to Jacksonville and continued our quest to eat out with Kellisa. At some point, I believe it was at an Olive Garden, we finally made it through a meal without having to carry Kellisa away. We always said we would go back and eat at The Lighthouse Café, but sadly it closed before we got the chance.

Kellisa still jumps at every little unexpected sound, but she is likely to giggle and brush it off as funny. She hasn't cried in probably close to 20 years from a loud noise. Kellisa has loved music since Lisa found The Wiggles on the television in the hospital when she was 4 (story can be found here). Since Kellisa discovered her love of music, she loves it loud! 

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Spiders

  Kellisa turns 22 on May 23rd and due to the ongoing pandemic, we do not have anything big planned for the second year in a row. I came up with the idea to share a few Kellisa stories in the week leading up to her big day. I'd like to post one a day, but only have two planned so far. These might be stories shared for the first time or stories that can be found elsewhere, but I'll add new details and/or more background. 

Kellisa in her room (5/21/2021)

Spiders. 

Anyone who knows Kellisa, knows she loves spiders!

What you might not know is where her love began.

We can trace this obsession back to when we visited Grand Canyon National Park back in March 2006. We were at the gift store and wanted Kellisa to pick out a souvenir T-shirt. The wall was covered with display shirts and Kellisa was immediately drawn to an orange shirt with a black, hairy spider with 8 legs sticking out the front. We were surprised by her choice and guided her to other shirts, but she kept coming back to the creepiest shirt on the wall to the point she was adamant on her choice. Lisa made the purchase and Kellisa was happy.

Kellisa wore the shirt with pride and loved all the attention. She loved that most people acted scared and shocked because the spider was so large and realistic looking. She wore that shirt every chance she got and we finally had to retire it many months after she outgrew it. We still have the shirt safely packed away somewhere in our garage. When we returned to the Grand Canyon in June 2010, we hoped to buy the same shirt in a larger size, but were disappointed to find the shirt no longer sold at the gift shop.  

Over the years, Kellisa has added to her shirt collection with all kinds of creepy shirts. Her vast collection includes spiders, snakes, lizards, alligators, sharks, bees...really anything that would scare the average person. Kellisa's collection has grown to include realistic decorations all over her bedroom. At any given time, you can find a rattlesnake lurking from under her bed to a flying bat circling her ceiling to a giant tarantula staring at you from some dark corner. We never know what we might see in her room and joke that if a real creature somehow got loose in her room, we'd never know it was alive. Kellisa also has an impressive scientific book collection featuring all the creatures she loves. Kellisa can spend hours flipping through her books looking at the realistic photographs.  

Kellisa's room is just how she loves it and we need to warn people before they enter her room. They usually look at us like we're crazy and probably think, "How scary can it be?" which is usually followed with a gasp or two, then thanking us for the warning.

Kellisa also loves visiting zoos with the snake house her favorite exhibit. We've even visited a bug museum once. Her younger sister, Egypt has always been around Kellisa and her unusual interests and also loves creepy creatures. I need to pry them away from the snake exhibit if we happen to stumble upon an active snake...they could watch for hours. 

Despite wearing that original spider shirt dozens, if not hundreds of times over the few years it fit, we cannot find a single picture of Kellisa wearing it. I also spent too much time unsuccessfully trying to find an image of the T-shirt online. I'll update this post (and probably write another) when we come across her shirt someday when going through the kid's clothes in the garage.

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True Friends

Jenny Sloan had no idea she would be the 2nd guest blogger in the almost 10 year history of Kellisa's Path when she posted the following heartfelt words on her Facebook status tonight. The timing couldn't be better as we approach Kellisa's birthday. There was a time when I wondered "Why?" Kellisa survived when two of her siblings didn't. I eventually came to the conclusion Kellisa survived to make a difference! To make an impact! To inspire! To change the world! 

We couldn't be prouder of Jenny who is also making the world a better place and we consider her an honorary daughter. 

  Appreciation post today for Kellisa. I got to talk to my best friend in the world today on facetime after an emergency plumbing accident and after calling everyone in my contacts, her dad, Chris Kain, was the only one to respond. 😂

When I tell you my heart could not possibly be fuller during that call, I mean it! I love this girl with all my f*cking heart. She is the one who motivates me to keep pushing on. She is the one that keeps me kind, keeps me inspired, keeps me loving and myself. I wouldn't be alive without her. Middle school is around the time you develop yourself. I met Kellisa in the 7th grade. We are 22 now. I would not be who I am without her massive impact on my person. I will be FOREVER grateful for that. I am the person I am today because of her. I missed her laugh so dearly, I was so ecstatic to hear it after so long. I missed her blowing kisses, and I heard her speak my name for the first time in a year. Tears. Kellisa, you mean the entire world to me. I can't imagine life without you and you just reminded me tonight how beautiful, special, and lovely you and your family are to me and everyone else in this world. I love you.  

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Best of Both Worlds Tour

 Kellisa turns 22 on May 23rd and due to the ongoing pandemic, we do not have anything big planned for the second year in a row. I came up with the idea to share a few Kellisa stories in the week leading up to her big day. I'd like to post one a day, but only have two planned so far. These might be stories shared for the first time or stories that can be found elsewhere, but I'll add new details and/or more background. 

Like most 8-year-old girls in autumn 2007, Kellisa was obsessed with Hannah Montana. When it was announced that Hannah's Best of Both World Tour would stop in Jacksonville in January 2008, I knew we needed to be there. 

We decided early on to let Kellisa live as normal of a life as possible, even if we didn't have to and/or it would be easier not to live life to the fullest. Kellisa would have never known Hannah was playing a concert so close, so it would have been easy to not go. But I knew and I also knew if Kellisa was a typical kid, she would know and would be begging and pleading for tickets. 

I was at my computer several minutes before the tickets went on sale with my credit card propped up so I didn't have to go looking for my wallet once I selected the tickets. At 10am exactly, I started furiously clicking away and each time I was turned away. I knew the show would sell out in minutes. I started to get nervous after 3 or 4 minutes and still no tickets. Any hope of being on the floor and close to the stage faded and within about 10 minutes, the show was sold out. I failed to get tickets for Kellisa. I was devastated, but at least she would never know, right? 

I sent an email to the arena explaining how my daughter uses a wheelchair and asked if there was any chance of getting special seating. Not surprisingly, when they wrote back, I was advised that all the wheelchair seating had sold out as well. 

At least Kellisa would never know what she missed. That was the story I tried telling myself, but I couldn't help feeling like I let her down. I didn't realize it at the time, but the mental torture in my head was being suffered by parents across the country as a ticket controversy was growing. Due to unprecedented demand for Hannah Montana tickets, brokers where buying many of the tickets before the general pubic had a chance and turning around to sell them online for hundreds and even thousands of dollars. I never had a fair chance and that did not help my mental state.

Jacksonville was no different than any other city, Hannah tickets on the secondary market ranged from $300+ up in the nose bleed sections to several thousand a ticket to be on the arena floor. I wanted Kellisa to be in the building, but I also wanted her to have a chance to see the stage. 

I became obsessed- watching eBay several times a day, every day, hoping to find a deal or maybe the prices would drop as the concert date approached. Neither of which ever happened.

The Jacksonville date was a Wednesday. A school night. I had taken the day off of work, just in case I figured out a way to attend. For months, I was searching for 3 tickets so Lisa and I could go with Kellisa, but since we were now out of time, I searched for 2 tickets together. I figured one parent and Kellisa was better than not going at all, but 2 tickets were just as much or more compared to 3. I started getting crazy thoughts of paying the exorbitant prices. I knew Lisa would be mad, but I was thinking about the old, "Easier to ask for forgiveness than permission" tactic.

A light bulb went off before I could do anything to get myself in trouble, I decided to look for any single tickets. I found one in the upper sections for face value and bought it. I looked for more and found another in the middle sections for 2 or 3 times face value. I bought that one too. I kept searching and a 3rd single seat became available, this time on the floor for 5 times face value. I now had 3 tickets. But first, I had to get some cash from the bank and drive around the greater Jacksonville area like a madman to actually get our tickets in my hands. 

It didn't matter that we had 3 single tickets scattered throughout the arena, I knew we would at least get in and I believed we would figure something out once inside. 

As I handed our tickets at the door, they were scanned and the man said, "You know these aren't together, right?"

Of course I knew, but I didn't care as we entered the arena which was already electric with thousands of little girls about to have the best night of their young lives. 

My first idea was to try and get on the floor, might as well try for the best. We were stopped and asked to present our tickets before we could enter the floor. I handed the lady our tickets with the floor ticket on top. Sadly, she looked at all 3 and said, "These aren't together. Only one of you can enter."

I was expecting that response and then started to plead our case. She couldn't help us, but pointed us in the direction of Guest Services. Once there, an extremely nice and compassionate lady helped us. I didn't even need to beg and plead. She told us to follow her and a few minutes later, we were at a wheelchair section with a perfect view of the stage. But, there was a problem. It was filled with mothers and daughters. None of them in wheelchairs or walkers or giving any indication why they needed wheelchair seating. 

The lady from the arena talked to some of the moms and they agreed to make room for us and to their credit, they gave Kellisa the best place to sit. Lisa stood behind Kellisa and I behind Lisa so we didn't block anyone's view. 

I am very critical of able bodied people for stealing the extremely few benefits afforded to people with disabilities. From where I was standing, I could see three additional wheelchair sections and not one wheelchair. My emotions were mixed. I was furious, but also thankful to have gotten Kellisa to where she needed to be.

Some of you might be thinking, maybe those other kids had invisible disabilities. Maybe the moms were disabled. All valid points, but before the concert started, a couple of the moms came over and basically told us how they scam to get the tickets by going for the wheelchair tickets first due to lower demand while everyone else fights for the regular seating. They were trying to be nice and share their secret to getting seats, but I also saw it as an admission of stealing something from someone with disabilities. 

Rant over. Kellisa was inside the arena! My mission was accomplished and like thousands of other girls for that night, she had the time of her life! This concert was two months before we purchased our first digital camera, so we didn't take any pictures. The above picture is Kellisa enjoying herself at the beach in her Hannah Montana concert t-shirt.

Lastly, it's been over 13 years and my ears are still ringing from all the little girls screaming their heads off for hours inside a building designed to maximize the sound. I heard the tour manager for Hannah describe the crowd as, "Worse than standing behind a jet engine."  

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